http://sofasterthanyou.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] sofasterthanyou.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] notarrowette 2008-10-09 03:45 am (UTC)

Bart sat silently for a few minutes, trying to gather his thoughts into some semblance of order while using Cissie's warm bulk and strong arms to keep him grounded. After a while, he cleared his throat. "It took me years after I was sent to the Speed Force to realize that I was chasing something unattainable," he began. "People rarely ever manage to leave, and when they do, it's only when someone else dies and joins us. Eventually I gave up." He sighed. "I was a wreck, Ciss. I didn't eat, I barely slept, I was too depressed to even shower or make any kind of effort to support myself. I spent a long time sponging off Max." He made a face, even though Cissie couldn't see it.

"After about ten years, I met this woman, Shannon. She was nice... reminded me a lot of Kon. Stubborn, beautiful, more caring than she'd like to admit. She had some of Tim's methodicalness, your caring. It was almost more than I could stand, being around her. But, you know. She was the closest thing I had to you guys. We got married two years later, and another three after that, we had twins. Boys." He smiled fondly. "Tim and Conner. Shannon wouldn't agree to Kon. She said it was a stupid name, and none of her children would be called that." Honestly, Bart thought it was because she knew that he was more than a little bit in love with Kon, and that was just too much for her to handle.

"I wasn't the best father to them, but I tried. And even though Shannon and I weren't all that compatible in the end, I still love--loved--my family. And now..." He swallowed hard. "Now I'll never see them again." He turned, pressing his face into Cissie's neck. "Oh, Ciss," he wailed, clutching at her as he finally allowed the tears that had been threatening him almost all evening to fall. "What have I done?"

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