20 Reasons I Hate the Paparazzi [a pictorial]

[notarrowette]

Okay. So I know I've got an Olympic medal and I've done some acting and commercials and stuff, but SERIOUSLY, I am not that interesting. I had to wait half an hour before I could leave practice this afternoon! And that was because the stupid paparazzi figured out my secret exit!! GYAH.

I hate them. Let me show you why.

To start, I would really like to know how crossing the street is SO DAMN INTERESTING:







OMG, SHE WENT SHOPPING, WHAT DID SHE BUY??







I mean... SERIOUSLY? They took a picture of my GROCERY BAG.



She also travels. I am in the AIRPORT, people. Leave me alone!





And, oh, my car is FASCINATING:





Look, she can drive!



But, I mean. SERIOUSLY???





I do NOT APPROVE.

I am kind of not known for being very cooperative with the paparazzi. I wonder why:







This look is 'I will throw my coffee on you, get out of my way now damn it':



This one is... well, I think I am saying something unpleasant:



I call this one 'Do Not Want':



And this is 'move it or I will run you over, I swear to god':

Comments

[nokidflash.livejournal.com]

So in that one where you're leaning into your car, we can sort of see your butt.

I'm just saying.

I'm glad it's my butt.

I mean.

Your butt.

But mine, too. <3

I know they suck, Ciss. Want me to run us to Africa for the weekend?

[cisskabob.livejournal.com]

:P Yes. Remind me not to wear those out in public again, okay?

Heh. Dork. <3 It's yours too, yes. Because I'm yours.

Africa, huh? Why Africa?

[nokidflash.livejournal.com]

Okay. But you'll still wear them at home, right?

I know. I love you.

Um, less papparazzi?

[cisskabob.livejournal.com]

If you ask nicely. ;)

I love you too.

True! More malaria, maybe. Can we see giraffes??

[nokidflash.livejournal.com]

Will you please wear those shorts at home? Pretty please?

We can get malaria shots or something. Yes, we can see giraffes. Whatever you want, BB. I can take you anywhere.

[cisskabob.livejournal.com]

You said pretty please. ♥ I will wear the shorts.

YAY giraffes! And MANATEES. I'd like to swim with manatees.

I want to be with you. We don't have to go anywhere--we could lock ourselves in the apartment for the whole weekend. And I could wear the shorts. ;)

[nokidflash.livejournal.com]

I did. ♥. Yay!

Haha, okay. They're not in the same place, but whatever. Maybe for our honeymoon we can just run anywhere you want and see all the animals and stuff.

... that sounds really nice. I'll put a Do Not Disturb sign on the door.

[cisskabob.livejournal.com]

♥

That sounds nice, but what about what you want to do? It's our honeymoon!

Oh, I like that a lot. We can get take-out too, and have it delivered!

[nokidflash.livejournal.com]

I want to run all over the world with you. That sounds perfect to me.

That sounds amaaaaaaaaaaaazing. Let's do it.

[cisskabob.livejournal.com]

Then we should do that. We could bring a tent, so we don't have to worry about hotel reservations. (And it would be like the road trip. ♥)

YAY!! Okay!!! :D

[nokidflash.livejournal.com]

I think that's perfect. And I'll talk to someone at S.T.A.R. about getting you some kind of suit and goggles so we can go faster, or at least so there's less stress on your body. It takes a lot of speed to run across water.

I'll order the food, you put on the shorts. ;)

[cisskabob.livejournal.com]

I think it's perfect, too. And that sounds wonderful. I love you.

Hee, yes sir. ;)

[nokidflash.livejournal.com]

I love you, too. Always.

;)